Local Coffee

For all you coffee snobs out there: if you have not visited Local Coffee – shame on you! I strip thee of thy self-appointed “snob” appellation.

Our American culture has forced every industry to meet our “give-it-to-me-now” expectations, including our morning coffee. To be sure, Starbucks has stepped in to fill that need to the point of saturating every market available. Starbucks will always have its staunch apostles, and vociferous critics. Regardless of your position, its dominance around the U.S. has established that cup of nasty and bitter Pike’s Peak as the standard.

I’m here to tell you that Local Coffee stands above and beyond any coffee house I have ever been to because of their dedication to a quality product, brewed with precision, and presented in an artistic fashion.

It all starts out with Cuvee coffee from a roaster just outside of Austin (you can read more about the roaster by clicking the link to their website). First of all, the coffee is directly sourced from their farmer-partners with a focus on specialty coffee. But that is just the beginning. Cuvee is so committed to providing a quality experience that they even provide barista training to ensure that the high quality extends all the way down to the cup of coffee.

Just about everything here is made through a French Press (press pot). Although there is an espresso machine on hand, it is rarely in use to actually brew the coffee. According to Robby Grubbs, the owner, nothing goes through a drip machine or any paper filters to ensure that all the flavors from the essential oils are captured. The barista’s attention to detail allows them to develop a “microfoam” from their milk. The precise angle and depth at which the steam wand is inserted into the milk draws out its naturally sweet flavor. If you think I’m joking here, wait until you try it and you will be a believer.

Like yourself (surely), I’ve had a lot of coffee from many different places. But it is rare (like never) that I am really surprised. Local Coffee does that. The flavor of the coffee itself has a natural sweetness to it, and the mouth feel of the foam is smooth and creamy, adding another layer of sweetness from its lactose lusciousness (sorry, had to do that). The only problem I have with the coffee here is that I finish it too damn quickly and that I want more!

Now, don’t expect to wiz through one morning for your regular 20oz. cappuccino. They only serve traditional capps here – so 8oz. only (one part espresso, two parts milk). My favorite? The latte is served in a 16oz. portion with your very own latte foam art (typically a flower or heart). So delicious its almost a shame to adulterate it with sugar.

The decor at both locations (Stone Oak and Alamo Heights) is decidedly industrial constructed from “green” materials with unique detailing throughout. Expect to find either location fairly busy, even during the middle of the day, filled with a wide demographic of people. Baked goods are available as are micro-brews and wines, which makes this coffee house a unique and attractive place to visit.

Trust me on this one.

Magnolia Pancake Haus

When my wife and I pulled into the parking lot where the Magnolia Pancake Haus, I was tempted to go elsewhere. There were gobs of people waiting in front of the establishment and out in the parking lot. At any other restaurant, this looked like a 1-1/2 hour wait. But I had been wanting to try out Magnolia for quite some time since I had read numerous reviews on the place, and was determined to make a go at it (as long as the wait was not too long). I don’t get to go out for breakfast very often. When I do, my wife and I like to go to the Guenther in the King William district, just south of downtown San Antonio. But, Magnolia was closer to where I needed to be later on that morning, so we decided to give it a try. (They recently opened a 2nd location on Huebner Rd.)

There’s a lot of hype about this place. In addition to several framed newspaper articles about the restaurant, the waiting area boasts numerous plaques awarded by the Express News and Current newspapers for Critic’s Choice and Reader’s Choice for best breakfast. The restaurant has received accolades from SA360, CitySearch.com, AOL City Guide, and the Texas Highways Magazine. In fact, LocalEats.com has recently named it one of the top 20 Best Breakfasts in the US. For the most part, the praise is deserved.

I only waited 30 minutes to be seated (exactly what the host said it should take). There is a tremendous amount of seating in this place and the staff turns tables efficiently. The place is very clean, and the bathrooms were practically spotless.

My wife and I decided to order a few things. We ordered the morning’s special, which consisted of a ham and cheese omelet and a side of pancakes for $7.99. For an extra $1.99, we upgraded the small side pancakes for a short stack. We also ordered biscuits and gravy, hashbrowns, and coffee.

The omelet was huge. Three eggs are folded over several slabs of what tasted like smoked applewood ham. We chose cheddar, although three other cheeses were available. The eggs were a little bland, but the ham was delicious. The hashbrowns were a little disappointing. Although a little firm, they tasted slightly overcooked in oil. Personally, potatoes taste much better cooked in butter. The biscuits and gravy were good, but not nearly as good as the Guenther’s. The menu says they are flaky biscuits with a side of Oma’s gravy. The biscuits were anything but flaky, yet lacked the density I prefer in biscuits. The gravy was a little thick, and lacked a hearty sausage and pepper flavors I would have liked. Surprisingly, the coffee was better than expected. We are hearty coffee snobs. This coffee was much better than what most places serve.

But let’s get to what Magnolia is known for – its pancakes. In fact, they boast that they make the best pancakes in the world. For me and my wife, they really are the best pancakes we have ever tasted. They have a very slight nutty and buttery aroma and flavor. But for us, the texture was what made them stand out. The pancakes were moist and spongy, with just the right density and consistency. It is very difficult to describe other than they did not have any of the negative characteristics associated with a bad pancake: doughy, airy, flat, flavorless, dry, rubbery – none of that.

Granted, the trophy for best pancake in the world most certainly is esoteric. I can just hear you now: “My grandma makes better pancakes than that!” Yeah, yeah, fine. Want the next best thing? Try Magnolia. Just be prepared to wait.

Jacala Mexican Restaurant

I really can’t remember the first time I went to Jacala Mexican Restaurant. There are probably a lot of residents of San Antonio who can’t remember either. What they probably do remember is that they can’t remember a time NOT going. Jacala has been around since 1949 and boasts that it is the oldest originally owned restaurant in San Antonio. I don’t think I have ever gone to the restaurant and not seen one of the owners there, greeting and seating. Jacala is one of those restaurants that has withstood the test of time, whose patrons bring their children and grandchildren to enjoy the food.

Granted, in my opinion, Jacala does not serve the most delicious and outstanding Mexican food in town. What they do serve is consistently good food at a good price. Even with long lines, you won’t wait long before you are seated. Restaurants serving poor food do not stick around as long as Jacala has. That, in and of itself, should be reason enough to check it out.

I recently went to Jacala with my family, my parents, and two second cousins, one of whom will be moving to San Antonio soon. One of my cousins, Carlos, had the guts to try the chicken enchiladas with mole sauce. Mole, to the uninitiated, can be a daunting dish. Made poorly, and you will forever swear off Mexican cuisine. Made well, and mole is an extremely complex sauce (Rick Bayless has an excellent description here). Although its base is stock (normally chicken), chili paste (usually from a non-spicy pepper like a pasilla), and bitter chocolate, most recipes can include upwards of 20 other spices and ingredients. In general, the mole flavor is pungent and sweet (like chocolate and raisins) all at the same time. Everyone has a different recipe for mole, some good, some bad. This one was good (not great, but good). Carlos loved it, and I respect anyone who will at least try something new (heck, he didn’t even know what an enchilada was).

The gorditas here are pretty good. The masa (or dough) is not overly grease-laden and the ground beef is not undercooked (which is a pretty common way many restaurants save money by not allowing so much shrinkage). They come two to a plate and are about 5-6 inches in diameter. As you can see by the picture, they are fairly messy to eat. The puffy tacos, although a little small, are pretty tasty. And the enchiladas, whether smothered in cheese, or topped with green sauce or mole, are pretty good.

Personally, I can’t get enough of the table sauce. If you can’t either, you should be able to find a jar with the restaurant’s name on it at your local grocer (assuming you live in San Antonio). If you have not checked out Jacala, I would recommend that you at least drop in to see why the rest of San Antonio loves this place.

Puerto Rican Heritage Festival

Every two years, the Puerto Rican Heritage Society (Sociedad Herencia de Puerto Rico) organizes and hosts a festival that features food, music, and cultural art. This year’s event was held at a different location than in past years and seemed to attract three times the attendance.  My favorite part of the event, of course, was the food.

We got there about an hour after the start and the line for food was already long. Several vendors were hawking food and the longest line was for La Marginal, a local Puerto Rican restaurant. Two lines formed at their booth to get one of two plates. The “Jibarito” (directly translated as “hillbilly”) consisted of roasted pork, rice and pigeon peas, small salad, and a choice of either tostones (fried plantains, aka “patacones”) or amarillos (baked sweet plantains. The other plate was fricaseed chicken with the same sides. My plate, shown here, was the “Jibarito” with both tostones and amarillos, and a chunk of potato stewed with the chicken. I also opted for the white rice and beans instead. Very yummy.

Each line was about 30 minutes long. My opinion is that they were just serving slowly. But the wait was worth it. While waiting, I hopped over to a booth run by Azuca, a restaurant serving Nuevo Latino cuisine. They offered a Spanish Paella and two desserts, a tres leches cake (three milks) and a flan (custard). My wife and I inhaled the Paella before I could get a picture of it. It was absolutely delicious. The rice was tasty, although overcooked just a tad, but it was full of seafood, peas, and carrots. For just eight bucks, I got a heaping plate of Paella that Azuca would probably charge about $24 for at the restaurant.

The Paella was made in a giant pan, probably about 36″ in diameter. It was gone in about 2 hours. La Marginal ran out of food seven times. The owner had to get his restaurant to keep bringing more food. My estimate is that the owner made in excess of $25k that afternoon. La Marginal also ran another booth out back serving fried food and roasted pork sandwiches. As much as I wanted some of this, too, I didn’t have the patience to stand in line again. There was another restaurant serving tapas, and a couple of other minor food sources, none of which I tried. The coffee was decent, the music was good, and the food was great. Maybe you’ll join me next time.

To cheat, or not to cheat

I recently posted a blog about my upcoming pig roast in which I asked my readers to identify a few pop icon pigs. It really was not that difficult.  But if you are socially inept and culturally unaware, even Pigs in Space would have been difficult for you.  Oddly enough, it was my dad who was the first to respond.  Yes, with all the correct answers. I immediately smelled a pig.

You see, although my dad may be somewhat of a neophyte when it comes to pop culture he is, nonetheless, a very astute individual. I did not realize that when I had

Who wants some eyeball?

Its time to claim the eyeballs!

The roast pig we are serving up on 12/20/08 is sure to offer a bonanza of meat and crispy skin.  However, there are several parts of the pig’s anatomy that can only be savored by a few.  Therefore, those need to be claimed ahead of time.

There are only two eyeballs on this pig, and they really can’t be shared.  Its like popping a jaw breaker in your mouth. To be honest, I’m not really that interested. However, whoever claims an eyeball also needs to agree to be featured in a video of you enjoying a taste explosion. C’mon now, don’t be squeamish. I once convinced my daughter, Isabel, to eat a fish eye. I’m not really sure how I got her to eat it since the usual enticements like encouragement, threats, bribes, or outright deception just don’t seem to work anymore on the kids. Yet, she popped it in and crunched. She didn’t say it was good, and she didn’t say it was bad – its a texture thing, you know?

However, I am willing to share the brain. Anyone?  Anyone?

While you’re thinking about it, take a look at this Man vs. Wild video.  Man, I love Bear Grylls.

Oh, Divine Pork skin

I recently consulted with a Puerto Rican restaurant owner about roasting pigs.  He is well-known in the San Antonio Puerto Rican community for his food and caters pigs often. So, I figured I better consult with an expert.  He said that roasting such a large pig for a get-together like mine, or as a hobby, should be a great experience. As a restauranteur, however, roasting large hogs is unprofitable. So, he normally sticks to the smaller variety (25-40 lbs.).

His explanation as to why, however, befuddled me (you like that word, don’ cha?). A hog this size has more fat than a smaller pig. Leonel said that people are very concerned about their health these days (hmm, this is San Antonio, one of America’s fattest cities, remember?) and thus, the large hog is not as popular. I’m not totally convinced of this explanation. People who order roasted pig are probably not so conscientious of their diet. I mean, goodness gracious, San Antonio is built on corn tortillas and refried beans. I mean, a bean and cheese taco is nothing more than lard inside lard (with cheese on top).

But even more disturbing was his assertion that non-latinos (my term, not his) are not very interested in the crispy pork skin produced by these larger hogs.  Can this really be true?  One of man’s greatest achievements to food-kind is the ability to turn pork skin into something crispy and delicious and succulent and…and…oh, I’m out of breath and I can’t think of any appropriate enough adjectives. If Anthony Bourdain was there he would have had a heart attack (that’s probably coming anyway, if you are familiar with his show).

Well, for those of you who have eaten at my home, you know that I’m all about pushing people’s paradigms about what they like or dislike, or what they THINK they like or dislike.  But maybe I shouldn’t let the cat out of the bag (or the pig off the grill, if you like). The more people that enjoy the skin, the less I get to eat.  That’s ok, I’ll get mine.

[So, first one to correctly identify all pigs in the pictures above gets an extra helping of pork skin. If you’re lucky, I’ll give you a cheek. Just leave your answers in the Comments.]

What is so special about pig, anyway?

Special? May my ears never indulge such blasphemy, and may the infidels who utter such a question be anathema. I pray that my first attempt to roast a pig on December 20 may bless your palate and not rain curses on my household and the children of my grandchildren (um, you should pray, too).

I can think of nothing better to tease you with than to have you watch a short clip (about 9 mins.) of Anthony Bourdain’s show, “No Reservations,” where he visits Puerto Rico.  As he explains in the beginning of the show, this is not your typical tourist travel show. Bourdain sets out to find the real culture of a city or country. He gets away from the tourist traps and the kitsch and explores the places we wish we could visit. He gives you an insider’s view of people’s homes, how they cook, how they interact with their families and friends.  Bourdain sums up his visits not with quaint descriptions of monuments or places, but by identifying a culture or society by its people and their beliefs, and exploring those beliefs through their food.

Here is a quote from Bourdain that I think best sums up this video: “Some people watch porn.  I…watch men chopping pork.”

Spice Asian Bistro

There are a lot of lame oriental restaurants in town. You know what I’m talking about – you’ve eaten at them. Spice Asian Bistro is not one of those. I’ve eaten there twice and been happy both times. For the most part, the menu is comprised of Thai dishes. There is also a comprehensive sushi menu as well as a few Chinese dishes as well. However, I went for the Thai food.

To be clear, I am not one of those newspaper food critics that goes in to an establishment with three other people who order and share numerous appetizers, entrees, and desserts…and again on a second or even third visit. On the other hand, I’m just a regular joe who can afford to eat out on a not-so-frequent basis. So, my wife and I order two entrees, and maybe an appetizer as well. However, those two entrees should be emblematic of the restaurant as a whole. If the food I’ve ordered is made well and tastes great, I can be fairly confident to expect the rest of the food to be just as satisfying.

And that’s exactly what I have found at Spice.

What was I thinking?!

As I mentioned before, this upcoming pig roast I am hosting will be my first time (I’m the “39 Year Old Virgin”).  I’ve given myself plenty of planning time (about 2 months) to ask a lot of questions and do some research. But when the owner of La Marginal, the Puerto Rican eatery here in town (the only one, as far as I’m concerned), heard of what I was attempting when I visited him for advice yesterday, his eyebrows raised a little bit.  Part of me was a little concerned.  “What the $!#@ was I thinking? I’ve already invited everyone!” The other part of me doesn’t care, as my wife will attest to.  I always have big plans, but never really give the details too much thought. I’ll let someone else do that. I’m a big picture kind of guy. In this situation, however, the onus is completely on me.

Although Leonel has roasted some large hogs, he prefers to to stick to the smaller ones (25-40 lbs.). Right here you are probably wondering: “What size porcine are we talking about cooking here?” Well, it needs to be about 100 lbs. based on the number of people coming. For him, as a restauranteur, the effort needed to cook a large hog is too great for the minimal return. For my purposes, however, I’ll just have to wake up early – real early.

To make things easier for me, however, I will be asking everyone to bring something. As some of you may know, I’m real picky about people bringing food to my parties. I normally have a theme and I like for my sides to match the main course. No different here, people. Very shortly you will be hearing from me and how you can help. I’ve never hosted a party where there will be more than 75 people attending, so this will be interesting.

So, back to my question: “What was I thinking?” Roasted pig, that’s what I was thinking.

Preparing for the pig roast

Lechon plate

I thought I would continue to get you excited about the upcoming pig roast by providing you with a picture of a typical Lechon Asado plate.  The lechón (or roast pig for you gringos) is a typical Puerto Rican dish, usually served at large gatherings.  Common side dishes (for me, anyway) would include yellow rice and pigeon peas (arroz con gandules), tostones (or fried plantains), and amarillos (literally translated as “yellows,” these are baked sweet plantains). No green stuff here except for in the marinade.

The lechón is the Puerto Rican version of pulled pork. The only difference, really, is in the marinade. Whereas your typical barbecue pulled pork would be marinated with a vinegar or apple cider base, the Puerto Rican version is marinated with a “mojo” (pronounced moho).  My mojo will consist of bitter orange, olive oil, garlic (enough to choke a brood of vampires), fresh oregano, salt, and pepper. Pretty simple, yet incredibly flavorful.  What is bitter orange, you might ask? Well, I can’t find it around here. Although it is pretty common in the tropics, even my specialty grocer doesn’t carry this particular orange.  Here, it is commonly referred to as a Seville orange.  However, you can make a semblance of the bitter orange by combining equal parts of regular orange juice and lime juice.  It will work just fine for me.

By the time this pig is done cooking, it will just completely fall apart. Get your appetites ready.

First annual pig roast

For those of you who have followed my blog before, please ignore the fact that I haven’t written a thing in quite some time. That’s what happens when you own two businesses, home-school three children, and are involved in law suits. Oh, well. Nothing gets my mind off of those things better than thinking of…food! (what did you think I was thinking about?)

I have been Jonesing for some well-made, crispy and tasty pork skin (chicharrón to you gringos). About the only way to get it is to make it yourself. So, that got me thinking: I should roast my own pig (mmm – pig).  Now, this isn’t such an easy undertaking, nor will it be cheap. And I’m certainly not going to roast a 100lb. pig just to get some skin. So, why not turn this into a huge shindig and invite my closest friends and family to enjoy it with me? Thus, our first annual pig roast!

As this process progresses, I will update this blog to show you how we’re putting this together. I’ve already spoken to several people about the idea and they are extremely excited, especially my mom. In fact, one of my friends even offered to provide the pig (sweet).  For those of you who are invited, you will be receiving regular e-mail updates. These updates will probably point back to this blog to give you further details and continue to whet your appetites.

This year I’ve decided to roast the pig “a-la-isla.” That’s what I call it, anyway. It will be done Puerto Rican style with many common Latin side dishes. I will be cooking the pig on an above-ground pit, somewhat like a concrete block “caja-china.” If this goes well (and the stress isn’t too horrendous), subsequent years will feature the same pig, but be cooked in different styles: Thai, barbecue, Hawaiian, etc.

Keep watchin’,’cause I think this is gonna be good!

Zinc – upscale lounge

My wife and I are not into the club scene at all. We do enjoy an occasional drink, but don’t enjoy the places that normally serve them as they cater to decadent youth focused on competitive imbibing. Not so with Zinc, located in the heart of downtown San Antonio within a short walk of the Riverwalk or the Alamo. This place has a more elegant and upscale feel than many other places do. The clientele seems different, too. At least when I’ve visited, the patrons are more subdued, enjoying the company of a small group of friends. Although the tv’s are usually showing a game, the volume is normally muted so as not to compete with the music or conversation. This is not the type of place you will need to raise your voice at to be heard.

The menu is lengthy with a good selection of wines, spirits, and specialty mixed drinks. Although I’ve never had their food, they also offer panini’s, pizza’s, and a couple of desserts as well. There is ample seating in the main bar area, as well as the adjoining lounge. On nice evenings, the outdoor courtyard is an excellent place to relax.

If you want to get away from the ordinary and step into a relaxing, adult environment, make sure to visit Zinc.

Boudro’s on the Riverwalk

I wish I had gotten the jump on San Antonio’s Express News review of Boudro’s, but sometimes life gets too busy and things go by the wayside. However, I have pictures! Here’s my two cents on a recent visit.

Whereas the writer of that article did not mind being shoehorned into her table, that is the first thing I noticed when my wife and I met my parents and my aunt and uncle at Boudro’s this past weekend. I expected this upscale restaurant to be crowded (this is on San Antonio’s Riverwalk, after all), but I’ve never seen a more worthy attempt at cramming tables and chairs into such tight spots. The small table couldn’t hold all of our dishes at once, the guacamole cart just would not fit between my uncle’s chair and our neighbor, and I think I actually rubbed hair with the person sitting behind me several times. Yes, it was also loud, but you sit so close to your tablemates that it doesn’t really matter.

My first impression was not good, and neither was my second.

Cappyccino’s: casual, upscale, fun bar & bistro

Cappy’s restaurant was opened in 1977 by Cappy and Suzy Lawton as one of the first establishments intended to revitalize the Alamo Heights area of San Antonio. Alamo Heights is an older, more affluent neighborhood that is a beautiful place to live and work. In 1996, the Lawton’s opened Cappyccino’s (“Little Cappy’s”) as an adjunct and complement to the popular and successful first restaurant. Its just across the patio from Cappy’s and offers quick and light fare. It is probably one of just a handful of full bars in San Antonio that is completely smoke-free and is a great informal place to meet for lunch, as is evidenced by the mix of casually attired as well as business-suited clientele.

The restaurant bills itself as a bistro, and its menu of burgers, salads, pizzas, and sandwiches fits the bill.

San Antonio Menu site

There’s a new feature on this site: San Antonio Restaurant Menus. Use this guide to San Antonio’s best (or worst) restaurants and their menus by clicking on the link here, or choosing the San Antonio Menu page/tab above. I’ve organized it by Cuisine Category to make things as easy as possible to find. If you don’t find what you are looking for, leave a comment and I will add the menu if it is available.

Like any major city, San Antonio’s restaurants serve a diverse range of cuisines:

• Alamo City Classics (the mainstays and staples everyone knows about)
• American & Regional
• Barbeque (BBQ)
• Breakfast
• Burgers
• Continental & European
• Cajun & Creole
• Chinese
• Coffee & Tea Houses
• French
• German
• Home Cooking
• Ice Cream
• Indian
• Italian
• Japanese
• Korean
• Latin
• Mexican
• Middle Eastern
• Pizza
• Pub Grub
• Steak
• Seafood
• Tapas
• TexMex
• Thai
• Vietnamese
• Many Value Restaurants

You name it, its here. Thanks for looking.

Coming soon…

Its interesting how viewership trails off without constant upkeep.  I’ve taken a very short hiatus to catch up on a few things, so expect some postings soon. thanks

Picture menus: sin or savvy?

Many restauranteurs would probably argue that pictures on a menu are just an outright abomination to the profession (Gordon Ramsey, for one). You don’t see any upscale restaurants with pictures on their menu, just a detailed description of the dish. To be sure, pictures on menus are reminiscent of fast food joints.

“I’ll take the combo #2, super-sized.” No description needed, the picture says it all.

“mmphogclakm zpechtorflam” is the reply from the speaker (that means “pull up” in drive-thru speak).

Is it a sin to have pictures on a menu? Any one of us can probably recall off the top of our head at least five restaurants we’ve been to with pictures on the menu (let’s see: Chili’s, Denny’s, Red Robin…hmm, all franchises – interesting). Do these restaurants know something that other restauranteurs don’t? I would venture to say that restaurants actually sell more of the pictured items, but I haven’t seen any data on this. Let me tell you what I think.

Will Starbucks get its soul back?

A couple of days ago an article came through on the AP wire regarding a memo issued by Starbucks Chariman Howard Schultz. This memo, delivered to Starbucks top executives about a year ago bemoaned the “watering down of the Starbucks experience. He complained that the company’s unbridled growth had sapped the soul out of the company. In this memo he pointed to the fact that many people find the stores “sterile” and “cookie cutter.”

How often do you see or hear about someone in a position such as Schulz’s being so candid about the company they run? Admitting there is a problem is the first step towards recovery, and Schultz hit the problem right on the head. As Starbucks saturates the market, the funky and cozy coffee houses (remember when they were called that?) have gone by the wayside. People are driven by convenience and efficiency, and its so much easier to pull up to the Starbucks drive-thru to pick up the morning java than to stop at a favorite coffee house and drink inside out of a ceramic cup. The original intent and philosophy behind the coffee house has waned, and in some areas, disappeared. In fact, after Starbucks switched to the fully automated machines, the pungent coffee aroma that used to permeate the air almost completely disappeared as well. Likewise, the craft of “pulling” a great cup of coffee or espresso is non-existent.

Here in San Antonio, I can only think of one coffee house that has retained this eclectic charm and that also serves good coffee. I only know about it because I stumbled upon it. On the other hand, Starbucks has become so ubiquitous through their marketing that even cartoons mimic and parody their logo.

However, hope may be in sight. Schultz is taking steps to bring the soul back to the stores. Different ideas have been tossed around to accomplish this, (like firing the CEO) but their success remains to be seen. I will be waiting in anticipation as I sip an espresso made from my Jura Capresso at home.

Shisha Cafe – Persian “pub grub” without the “pub”

I decided to check out the Shisha Cafe this weekend because I was in the mood for something different and inexpensive. After looking through the local paper’s top dining picks for Middle Eastern fare, Shisha Cafe fit the bill and was close to where I work. The cafe occupies a small spot at the end of a strip center and has indoor and outdoor seating. Despite its name, however, I am inclined to report that this place is more of a lounge or parlor rather than a cafe, and I will have to respectfully disagree with the Express News’ assessment that the fare is worth investigating.

“Shisha” is the Arabic term for what many know and refer to as a “hooka” pipe. And as the name implies, the focus of the cafe is indeed smoking (“oh, and by the way, we serve food”). Evidence of this fact became more apparent as my family took a seat inside on plastic patio furniture and torn rattan tables. Thank goodness the music is kept at an acceptable level because I can only take so much of watching overly-produced Persian music videos featuring Western looking people singing in Guiness record-breaking tone and voice modulations. Popular American board games await on a shelf at the front counter for patrons to pass their time until the place closes at 4am. Rather than visiting a restaurant, the large bong (oops, I mean water pipe) assortment made it seem like I had entered a reincarnation of a “Magic Habits” head shop sans rock music, glow in the dark posters, and age limit warning signs.

My first disappointment is with